So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
