I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
