fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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