oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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