3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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