And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I enjoy the company of your penis
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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