I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He felt like a one man threesome
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
