Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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