if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
