PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
