Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
