So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
