i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
