I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize