wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
