I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Randomize
