Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
