when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
