After last night, I could never be a politician.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i would one night stand the shit outta him
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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