ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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