Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
