so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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