Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
