Banned from zoo.
Again?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Just took my morning after pill in the library
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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