I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Randomize
