I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I lost the right to judge tonight
You've changed since you got that strap on
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
