I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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