My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize