Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
