gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
