I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
