I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
