Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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