from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
