does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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