Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
