How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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