operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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