Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
