My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Terrible idea I love it
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
