I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
