you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
