i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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