Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
My Sexting was not on an AP level
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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