Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
