speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
i think i just lost a toe
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
