Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
