We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
