What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
