you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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